One of the questions so many of us struggle with when it comes to creating lasting change and even deep transformation is how to make that first big move. So often we feel paralyzed when it comes to taking action because we get stuck in our head about that first step needing to be the “right” step or having “decisive” impact. While it makes perfect sense that we would want to really make a difference if we are going to do anything, something…it is usually a way we end up avoiding even an incremental shift. When we choose to make a change in our life we must do something that is of course challenging but more important, it must be feasible and meaningful in the larger process. So consider the impact of a tiny but well coordinated effort when it comes to moving the dial of personal transformation?
Indeed, making lasting change in our lives is just like a series of dominoes. The video above demonstrates how even a tiny, seemingly insignificant but focused and planned effort can be compounded into enacting HUGE change!!! If you decide that you want to move from a series of painful relationships to the ability to the most passionate, loving partnership imaginable then you would likely not imagine that this amazing relationship will just show up on your doorstep tomorrow simply because you willed it to be so! Rather, you understand that in order to manifest the big picture you must focus on the first, and then the next tiny domino…
The physicist above places his first domino with TWEAZERS, it is SO small….so PUNY…and yet it is the most important piece of the puzzle because it is the energy of that first little move that gets rolled into knocking over the next obstacle and then the next and the next, each being proportionally larger and seemingly insurmountable until it happens! This is how it works in therapy. Even when it feels like we might be moving slowly or that the end goal is so far away and so massive, what is most important are those first tiny steps along the way that generate the momentum and conscious intention focused on the desired life at the end of the series of steps.
SO DON’T GET DISCOURAGED! If you plant some seeds in your garden because you want a home grown salad you would not likely dig up the garden tomorrow expecting a row of tomatoes! That wouldn’t make a lot of sense, right? If you plant seeds in the garden, you understand that it probably won’t be salad material for months and even then, it is reasonable to assume that you’ll have to water and weed throughout the summer. Likewise, if all you can think about is that last, huge domino then it tends to feel unattainable. Therefore, we focus our intense and devoted energy on that very first domino. Take the first step. Make a small movement toward your big goal. Take out sugar if you want to lose weight. Walk for fifteen minutes, don’t focus on running a marathon! Book a therapy session if you want to understand your internal process in more depth!